Well, the Universe has blessed me with yet another new experience. I have a friend who reads tarot cards who once told me I am an "old soul in search of new experiences". Well, add vesicovaginal fistula to the list.
Its basically a complication of female pelvic surgery (I had the hysterectomy 12/1) or difficult childbirth (its really common and terribly untreated in the developing world..
) where a path of scar tissue forms a connection between the bladder and the vagina. So, you get to pee from a new hole! While this might be all fun and stuff for waterworks enthusiasts, its not exactly fun during your day job. Or if you don't sleep on polyvinyl sheets.
Went to Dr. here Jan 2, he placed a lovely super fun (for a masochist) foley catheter to dry me out and then I was sent to my surgeon in Mobile yesterday (Jan 6). I got in over there for a cystogram, where they pump dye into your bladder thru your catheter if you have one already or a catheter they put in if they dont. At this point, its no biggie for me to take off my pants in a room ful of strangers while they take photos. I think I see a new career in my future.
The results are in today: Vesicovaginal fistula (tiny) that may heal spontaneously if I leave the catheter in awhile. So I am in this catheter (or its in me) till at LEAST Jan 20. I have a fancy leg bag, and with the help of pain meds, a donut pillow, and lidocaine jelly placed in exactly the location you imagine, I can function at a rudimentary level. No running marathons, but if I sit at my desk without moving long enough I forget its there.
I might need another surgery to repair it, or it may heal on its own.. I am hoping for the latter.
I still don't regret having the hyst, I am in so much less overall pain. This is just an annoying complication. I dont blame my doctor (I think he was nervous about this) and I'm just trying to absorb whatever wisdom this experience has to give me at this point. I did learn a hell of a lot about indwelling catheter care and I ordered some new abdominal 24/7 piss bag thats supposed to alleviate the need to change bags day/night. (Leg bag for day, big bedside collection bag at night).
Oh, and I am eternally thankful that I am NOT male. I hear urethral catheters in men are WAY worse, tho I would love it if my pee hole were conveniently placed where it was away from the poo hole (less infection risk) and where I could sit down without a donut. But I dont want another several inches of urethra nor the pain of erections, so I'll take the donut.
This whole thing has been a real PISSER.
